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AussieKinga
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Name: Kingsley
Country: Australia
Metro: Perth
Birthday: 5/4/1983
Gender: Male
Interests: Reading. Soccer. Aussie Rules Footy. Cricket. hanging out with friends. etc etc
Expertise: I know a whole lot of useless stuff about bands most people have never heard of.
I also am good at maths and physics and stuff.
Occupation: Student
Industry: Engineering
Message: message meEmail: email me
AIM:  AussieKinga
Member Since:
9/19/2003
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| So i have just come back from a GREAT week away at the Planetshaker's Conference. my youth group combined with the Merredin youth group (which my brother and his wife run) to take 40 people down to a week long camp of going to the beach, water parks, movies (saw Happy Feet - its great "Wait, I hear people wanting something... Its Me!"), little sleep and the Planetshakers Conference. the whole thing was great, and got to meet a whole tonne of new pople, whom cos of a setting like that you become close with fairly quickly.
Camp started on the monday, finished on saturday (tho i left very very late friday night cos of work on sat), with the conference running gfrom tuesday night til friday.
We were split up into 'tribes' (read "Teams") for little competions during the week... games, sandcastle building, etc. My tribe - The Blue Ninjas, which i ran with Jess from merredin, won the overall compition. which was great.
The Planetshakers conference is all about emporing a generation for God. and it was great. 11 session across the 4 days, inclueding two elective sessions - which i took 'business' and 'leadership' (they also had High School, Uni, Worship, Empowerment, Overseas Mission I think). Overall I didnt find the conference as good as some of the privious years, but it was still very good and coupled with the rest of the camp it was really really good. Several of the speakers has a emphassis on healing - physical, emotional and spiritual, which was quiet good. ive actually come out of this camp feeling better and stronger then i have in a long time. and especially when you think about my last post on here (wihich was done when i was very upset - its like shoppping when you are hungry, you shouldnt blog while you are upset), it is what i needed.
so yeah, feeling good. has a very good week and i really need sleep. the next few weeks should be good too, once i get past monday. i have my supplimentary exam for uni on monday... but after that in the coming weeks i have Australia Day celebrations, Aussies V NZ cricket, Big Day Out 07, youth group startying up again (I need to start praying about what we are doing for devos this term) and mcuh other great stuff.
in other news, maryanne (along with some others) is currently on Mozambique (spelling?) on a missions trip, and Im sure would appreciate any prays you have for her.
have a good week, y'all. | | |
| im feeling in a very introspective mood right now... and ive had a bad day so this is just me getting rid of some of my more... unhappy? thoughts. dont worry too much, i just really need to vent.
ever feel like you arent liked? i feel that often. not that im not loved, i know im loved. i have lots of people around me who continually let me know they love me. but often i feel like im not LIKED. which sounds weird, to be loved but not liked. I dont believe I am disliked either. which in some ways would be better then the middle ground 'nothing' i often feel. at least i would get a reaction from people. its like if im there, fine. if im not there, fine.
People dont not want me around. If i go somewhere with them they are happy enough for me to come along, they enjoy my company etc. but if I dont go i never get people coming up afterwards going "we are sorry you couldnt make it" or "where were you the other day?" or whatever. no one goes out of their way to invite me to stuff. If im around when its planned I'm invited, but if not then noone goes to the effort of inviting me. well... alomst noone, but usually when it is someone it is the same someone every single time. it really makes me wonder if im a 'out of sight, out of mind' kind of person. I often find if im going to something... going out somewhere or whatever, its because i have organised it, not because ive been invited. and im really not the sort of person who will invite themselves to things. and i cant say anything to anyone because it would feel like they are changing just cos i asked, not cos they want to. it doesnt feel sincere. (thats a stupid arguement and when someone says it to me i tell them that, but on the other end of it it really does make sense)
Probably doesnt really help that i live out of town on a farm, although the drive into town isnt long and im happy to do it. maybe im just overreacting. maybe im just needy.
i am needy. i know that. Im a needy person. maybe too much so. i like to be liked. i like people to want me around. i really like it when people message me for no reason. more then that, i generally feel a need to be needed. if feel best when i know people need me. i want people to rely on me, or ask my advice or whatever. I like going out of my way to help people. this has its good points, but often i feel the bad outweight the good. like it causes me to get upset or down when im not needed. when im not invited out. or when i dont get any text messages. ive alway kinda known i rely on others way to much for my happiness. i know i shouldnt, but i do. i think this had a major part to do with maryanne and my breakup... we are both needy people. she needed me, and that made me feel good. and i helped her. but somewhere she realised we were suffocating each other or something. i dont know. i do know it is a major part of why im not coping well right now, cos im not needed.
i think the neediness also pushes others away. someone is nice to me or shows even the slightest bit of interest and i seem to latch onto them. i need freinds. i need people around me. and my incestant need to get people around me just scares them away. i guess it comes back to the 'out of sight, out of mind' feeling - i probably am not out of their minds, i just feel like i am and thus try make them remember me. i wish i could stop myself from doing this, but i find it hard. why do i do this?
i come on the net way too often just to check if someone has sent me any messages or emails... which is really sad. im never going to make it is i live or die based on whether or not someone leaves me a message.
just something else ive noticed in the last few weeks... im trusting people easier. and more. i used to never be able to trust anyone, or talk about my thoughts. and recently i have moreso. i dont think i ever could have posted something like this before. still, i am happy its only online friends who will read this... i cant imagine showing this to pepople i see every day.
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| its been a while since i updated here. but whats new, im alwaysd bad with this.
the biggest news since i last posted would be that i am now single again. long story why, and i cant be bothered going into details about it. if you REALLY must know then ask and i MIGHT tell you more. otherwise im doing okay, but not gtreat, and would appreciate prayer. thanks.
in other news.... got my uni results back... a high Distinction, a distinction and... a fail. but cos of the D and HD and the fact i only just failed (a couple of %) they have given me a supplimentary exam in late January. so ive got til them to learn all the stuff i didnt know for the first exam so hopefully i can pass. something to look forward too.
Im still working way too much. six days a week. but then im paying off my car quickly, so thats good.
My sisters and parents are currently over in Queensland for a holiday and will be for a couple of weeks so christmas this year is slightly different to normal... we actually did our family thing last weekend and on Boxing Day (dec 26th, Im not sure americans call it that) Ive been invited to go to my borthers in-laws for christmas because we arent doing our big cousins and everyone christmas.
got my mum a few books, got Macgyver DVDs for my sister Kalina and then for the rest i went in with other family members to get bigger items for presents - a Outdoor setting for my sister Lynette, a lawn mower for Jono and his wife, Nicole, and a GPS for my dad to put in his Peugeot 307 - which he is using to find his way to Queensland, cos they are driving over there (only 4000km - 2500miles - each way).
for christmas i got a new watch (which is good cos i cant find where i put my other one, which i lost about a week ago), a portable pizza oven (i LOVE pizza), a Fuseball table(!!!!!), tickets to see the Australia vs New Zealand Cricket match (american, cricket is a British Empire sport fyi) and then a few other odds and ends.
Also as a present to myself I bought a ticket to Big Day Out 2007, which has Tool, The Killers, my Chemical Romance, Muse and about 30 other bands playing. so that will be really good. www.bigdayout.com for details.
Finally, i have opened a MySpace. ive never really liked MySpace, and after using it for a bit i do find it annoying to setup, but on the positive side there are a whole lot of reallife (not just online) friends who use it, so ive linked with them and can message them easier. i will still keep this xanga and update it (infrequently as normal) because it allows me to write stuff and know noone from where i live will read it, which is useful.
but if you want to add me on mySpace, it is www.myspace.com/aussiekinga (Im origional with my name, arent i?)
so thats me at the moment.
so to all people who read this... MERRY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY NEW YEAR. hope god blesses you in the coming weeks.
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| Well i know everyone was really worried about me *cough cough* cos i havent posted in so long...
Things have been REALLY hectic recently, thus the lack of posts. Uni is in overdrive at the moment. Thankfully most of my assignments were due last week, so i have a little breater right now. My final year project (well, the first of two - one i'll do next year) i coming along well, although i really feel Im doing very little for it and the rest of the team are doing alot more. Ive more done research and advising, so nothing of mine really appear in documents or coding. But Ive made up for it in all my other classes.
Work is hectic - but thats same as always. Ive even lost friday as a study day at work. Previously i used to be albe to study while babysitting a warehouse, but work has picked up and its no longer babysitting. its actual hard work. well... not that hard. My parents bought a new Isuzu 3.5 tonne 6-pallet truck for the business, which is pretty much MY truck, as i will be driving it 80% of the time. So i'll have to get photos and show it to you all.
Tonight is Maryanne's Yr 12 ball. She looks SO gorgeous (photos WILL be put up later). I wasnt able to go with her as outside partners are only allowed to be one year older at most, so she went with a friend from work (Subway), Jason. Hes a really cool guy. Absolute champ. So im glad shes going with him.
I took a whole tonnoe of photos with both our cameras. And jason's. And then her's rang out of memory, so i gave her my memory car for her camera (hers is better). It wasnt until i got home that i realised that ALL my uni work was on that memory card and thus i cant do the assignment i was going to work on tonight. So pretty much i have been forced to take a break from it.
Meaning i have free time for once. Meaning i post here. YAY.
Couple of weekends ago we also had maryanne's birthday party out at my parents farm. it was great. had a bonfire and... a bouncy castle. so much fun. i think every party should have a bouncy castle. Again i have photos that i should upload one day. one day.
when im at uni, not from home. stupid dial-up internet....
perth Royal Show this weekend. Maryanne and I are going to go, along with some other friends from uni and church. Also got one of the uni guys engagement party this weekend.
and in little over a month i have Maryanne and my 1 year anniversary.
so thats whats happened recently with me. what is happening. and all that.
like i said... very busy.
PS just because i dont post6 doesnt mean i dont read your posts. i do. so yeah... sorry i dont comment much.
Maz and Jason | | |
| ive only got a couple of minutes before class starts... but i thought i really need to update here. things are going well, although very busy. its 3rd week back at uni now and already got so much stuff to do.
the car situation is getting sorted. ive found a new car (2002 Holden Vectra, which is actually a rebadged Opal Vectra), and have put a deposit on it. just waiting for the isurance cheque now. so hopefully i shoul;d have my new car by the end of this week. finger crossed. i'll post photo and stuff when i get it.
my Grandma came over from queensland the other day. just a quick stop off on her bus tour of Auastralia. but it was cool to see her. had a family dinner and stuff.
lots of other stuff i could say, but not a whole lot of time. so yeah... sorry ive been bad at updating here. | | |
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